Going to Extremes

As I head into the last 6 days of I'm down ten pounds and more importantly God is helping me find my clarity and focus. The determination and commitment to improving myself both physically and spiritually has brought about multiple layers of self awareness and new reserviors of strength to draw upon. Knowing that God is the source of all of my strength and the source of power for me to recharge is a huge advantage in conquering those challenges we are each faced with daily.

Currently, I am on a journey to A) Find my relationship and path with God, to make him my focus B) to lose 50 lbs from my starting weight of 245 lbs, by changing my eating habits and exercising at least 5 times a week. (initially my goal was to be accomplished by my birthday on June 9th which would have given me 5 months...now the time schedule has been moved up to Mother's Day, May 10th, 4 months!) C) to change my outward image and internal perspective on how I live my life daily.

Three worthy and worthwhile goals. Each requiring me to reflect upon myself and my actions, my decisions and continually take stock in where I am at and where I am headed. When combined as a trio these three create a foundation for me to build upon.

Now for the extreme! With only six days to go til Mother's Day I am eight pounds away from my goal weight. Yesterday, I decided it was time to make the sacrifice and commitment to make the final push and attain my goal of presenting my wife with a 50lb lighter husband for Mother's Day! Maybe not the most romantic gift, but one of extreme dedication and devotion to the one I love, the Mother of my children. As of midnight Saturday, I have only had water, juice and broth and plan on 3 days of serious fasting. *If you haven't read the disclaimer and warning in the previous post, please do so now! I know that God is making me better each day and giving me the energy and strength to make those choices which will help me to find my way.

Last week as I was working and praying for revenue streams to be created and sources of income to come into my life, I found myself confronted with an internal conflict I have been battling with for months now. The paradox of God & Self. If God is in my heart and I am working to build a strong relationship with God and Jesus as my focus, to become a humble servant and tool for building God's kingdom. If God is in me and Self is in me, then God = Self. Therefore, there can be NO "self-doubt", "self -sabotage", "negative self-image", because God is a loving, caring, compassionate God, provider, healer, teacher. With that realization, my breakthrough into the light and freedom of letting go of the negativity inside me was breath taking! Thank you God for allowing me on this journey to find my way into the light and become the man of God you knew I could be. No more negative "self" can live within me as GOD fills the darkness with light and hope.

As a new day dawns and the light comes into the world banishing the darkness, I will go forth and conquer the challenges in front of me with a smile and a cheerful heart, joyous in my walk with God and all the goodness He brings. The credit and glory is all for God, I am building a testimony for those who are also trying to find their way! Be blessed in all you do and remember that as we are blessed we are to be a blessing to others!

That's what's on my mind today, we'll see what the day brings and what impact I can make for good.